How to Develop Your Military Family’s Resilience

Resilience. We’ve all heard this word. Each military branch offers resiliency training, there are courses to build resilience, and it is a popular topic as we try to navigate the numerous stressful events and experiences that dot each of our lives. 

As a mother of two young children and the spouse of a Navy veteran who deployed multiple times, I’ve come to learn about resilience. But, I haven’t always thought about what it means to actually be resilient. Sure, we always hear it’s the ability to bounce back after tough times, but it’s also so much more than that.

Being resilient means recognizing when things are really hard and that you may need to ask for help. It’s being vulnerable enough to talk about your emotions and reactions, and it’s being open to the growth that all new and difficult experiences bring.

Being resilient is not a magical trait that some are lucky enough to possess; it takes work, and it’s tied to our overall mental and physical wellness. The more we build up our support systems and take care of our own needs while we stretch ourselves thin to take care of others, and the more we say yes to the things that fill our energy reserves and no to those that drain us, the more resilient we start to become.

I have learned through each deployment, through each personal setback, through each new and unexpected turn as a parent, and through a very difficult pandemic that I am resilient, and so are you. 

The American Red Cross knows this and provides resilience-building workshops that recognize and draw from your natural resilience to help you translate it into practical ways to get yourself and those around you through the toughest of times. Each workshop is centered upon a topic relating to an area that’s most meaningful to you, whether you’d like to learn tips to better manage your stress, ways to improve communication with your family, how to tell if someone you care about is at risk of suicide, or how you can learn to take deep, healing breaths. Each workshop is built specifically for those within the military and veteran community. You can interact with others who have been through similar situations, support those around you who are going through difficult times, and learn professional tips from the licensed mental health volunteers who facilitate these sessions. 

Each of us is different and learn and grow in unique ways. For those who would like to connect with others and engage in skill-building activities, there are Reconnection Workshops. Prefer a more internal, experiential session? Try one of two available Mind-Body Workshops. And for those who want to learn about how to support others and build resilient communities from the ground up, there are four Psychological First Aid courses available on the topics of coping with deployments and coping with change in the military. The workshops can be taken in person as well as virtually, and they are offered as single stand-alone sessions.  

As a licensed professional counselor, the program manager for Red Cross Service to Armed Forces behavioral health programs and—more importantly—a part of the military and veteran community myself, I can personally speak to how valuable these workshops can be. The volunteers who created and provide these programs every day around the world are service members and veterans, military family members and caregivers. They are also mental health experts, and they care about the wellbeing of every person who participates in a resiliency workshop. 

Remember, resilience often comes with taking action in a positive direction. It comes with choosing to do something valuable for ourselves and our loved ones. And, it comes with having choices, control, and flexibility to change and grow in ways that work for you.

By Melissa Porrey, American Red Cross Program Manager for Behavioral Health Programs

 

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American Red Cross

American Red Cross

The American Red Cross shelters, feeds and provides emotional support to victims of disasters; supplies about 40 percent of the nation's blood; teaches skills that save lives; provides international humanitarian aid; and supports military members and their families. The Red Cross is a not-for-profit organization that depends on volunteers and the generosity of the American public to perform its mission. For more information, please visit redcross.org or cruzrojaamericana.org, or visit us on Twitter at @RedCross.

One thought on “How to Develop Your Military Family’s Resilience

  • Sharita Knobloch
    May 12, 2021 at 12:30 pm
    Permalink

    Melissa, your blog post made my heart smile SO BIG– not only because it’s all true and well-written, but because the concept of resilience in military spouses is very near and dear to my heart #HelloDissertationResearch.

    You are so right– resilience is important and absolutely worth facing adversities, asking for help, taking care of ourselves and coming out stronger the other side. It’s a fascinating concept– resilience begets resilience. The stronger we become, the healthier and more resilient our military families and at-large military force becomes as well. Great job!

    Reply

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