OCONUS Military Spouses Build Community
By Susan Malandrino
After you PCS, do you ever arrive at a new location and feel completely lost? In my time as a military spouse, this feeling was further exacerbated during our OCONUS tours. When we moved to Japan, my twins were three, my spouse was immediately gone off on deployment, where he remained for most of the tour. I couldn’t figure out the language, let alone the basics of this new life we had been thrown into a million miles from the comforts of home.
I recently met two Air Force spouses who not only shared similar experiences but were actively working to help other military families in that same situation.
Jennifer Mohr and Victoria French, both stationed at Aviano Air Force Base in Italy, were getting ready to celebrate the 4th of July when we caught up. We joked about how this holiday, along with Thanksgiving, are always so other worldly and often challenging when you live so far from home.
Both Jennifer and Victoria agreed and shared their own stories of isolation as they sought to connect at a new duty station. During their time in Italy, both have found connection through their work with the Red Cross. Volunteer roles have turned into jobs and the two stay busy connecting working with service member and military families at Aviano.
“We want our military community to know that we are here to support them. That’s one of our roles at the Red Cross — to let people know that they are not alone,” said Jennifer.
Victoria agreed saying that the language barrier living overseas and deployed spouses can make the day to day life even more challenging.
“We don’t really have a village built into our family structure anymore and it can be hard for families to navigate it all,” she said.
“In our role at the Red Cross, we want to serve as that village.”
Jennifer and Victoria shared their own challenges, similar to those many military families face, including the isolation of moving to a new place without employment or a support system — including finding a new home or adapting to base living, enrolling children in new schools, making new friends and adapting to a new community.
Jennifer says that the ripple effects of the COVID pandemic put additional strains on military families living abroad. With the war in Ukraine, deployment surges for U.S. service members to Eastern Europe have added additional stressors for families stationed overseas.
“It’s hard enough to move and adjust to a new place but as military families, we have unique challenges to face,” Jennifer said.
Jennifer says that through it all, the Red Cross is there to help people connect. “I think when people come and especially volunteer with us, they say, ‘Wow, other people are having the same struggles as I am mentally, especially during COVID.’ I think that was a really big thing to address. And so it’s just nice to have that sense of community,” she said.
For Victoria, a big part of building community is meeting the current needs of families. “We ensure that our office is kid-friendly,” she said.
“Our volunteers often bring their kids and we have meetings with them in attendance. I feel like that is so great, especially for moms who often are doing the work of both parents during a deployment,” she said.
At Aviano Air Base, the Red Cross provides CPR training and supports emergency messages for service members and their families. “But we also show up in other ways — including all of the community events,” Jennifer said.
For the holiday weekend, Victoria and Jennifer will be at the base 4th of July fireworks celebration handing out sunscreen, bug spray and water bottles leading up to the even
“It may not seem like much but people know that we are always here,” Jennifer said.
“We’re here and part of the community, we want to underscore that all year.”
I can think of no better way to celebrate the 4th July, surrounded by a caring and supportive community.
Kudos to my new friends — Victoria and Jennifer who continue to build community no matter where they are.
If you want to connect with your local Red Cross, visit us at www.redcross.org.
Susan Malandrino is a Communications Lead for International and Service to the Armed Forces at the American Red Cross. Based in Washington, D.C., she’s married to an active-duty Naval aviator. She’s a twin mom who has completed 7 PCS moves across three continents. In her spare time, you can find her marathon training, listening to audio books, or dragging her family to museums.
