Thoughts from a Guardsman Spouse

If you’re married to a Guardsman, you hear it often. “It’s only once a month! It’s not that big of a deal!”

Truth is, it really is a big deal. Because those weekends are the worst.

Those are the weekends that all the ballgames, family commitments, and kids getting sick will happen.

Those are the weekends when the kids will throw every ‘tude known to man, both at you and at each other.

Those are the weekends that all Hades breaks loose everywhere. Oh! And something always breaks!

Those are the weekends you question yourself the most.

You question your ability to parent. Your ability to run a household. Your ability to juggle all the commitments along with your sanity.

Then, when things get really dark, you start questioning the biggest question of it all. The one question that keeps you up at night. The one thing that will bring you to your knees faster than anything else.

If we can’t survive a single weekend, then how on God’s green earth will we ever survive a deployment?!

If I find myself hiding on the floor in the back of my closet with a half-empty bottle of wine, crying so hard that I can’t breath and I need to change my shirt, how am I ever going to survive a deployment?

How are my kids going to survive?

How are we all not going to end up in a mental institution with padded walls and an endless supply of wine and apple juice?

To be totally transparent? I don’t know.

I honestly don’t.

But I do know I will survive.

And so will you.

Why?

Because it’s what we do. It’s who we are. It’s what we are made to do.

Somehow, some way, that Wonder Woman in all of us comes out. Yes, we will be in the back of the closet with that half-empty bottle of wine. Yes, we will need to change our shirt from all the snot and tears of our ugly cry.

But we will rise up, put our big kid pants on, and do what we must.

We will juggle every engagement and activity.

We will wipe every snotty-nosed sick kid.

We will meet every doctor’s appointment.

We will make sure homework is done, that kids are fed and bathed at least once a week, and maybe, just maybe, you yourself will get a shower once a week too.

Why? Because we are milspouses. And no matter if you are full-timer or a “weekend warrior,” you hold your own until your soldier comes home.

And then you hand them the kids and say “peace out” to a much needed, long weekend getaway by yourself.

Why? Because it’s what we do.