‘What IF…’
Right now, I am sitting in an airplane going with my husband to a class in Kansas. This class is special, since no children are allowed. It is the first time in 12.5 years that we are alone for six days—date nights not counting. When my husband told me about the opportunity to go to this class without our children, my first thoughts were:
“Who is going to watch our children?”
“Is this class really so important for me to be there as well?”
“What if something happens to the kids while I am gone?”
“What if…”
The what ifs can drain your energy and steal your joy. “What if…” can hinder us from opportunities and experiences that otherwise we would never experience. In my mind, I do “what if” scenarios to be “prepared” for all kinds of outcomes, or so I think. Eliminating different possibilities without even experiencing them or knowing if they would ever happen.
“What if” makes me feel safe and secure, as well as in “control” of the outcome, because it is an outcome that I can predict for myself and am comfortable with. However, by doing that I only see the problem or situation from one side. I don’t see any other options or possibilities. By doing this kind of analysis, I hinder myself from experiencing a new job, a new adventure, a new culture, a new friendship, a new…
For instance, this morning we got bumped to stand-by for the next flight because we missed our deadline for the baggage check in by five minutes. When the lady at the counter told us that, my mind already formed ten possible “what if…” scenarios.
What if we miss our connection flight?
What if the flight is super full and there is no place in the plane for us and we need to fly out with the next one?
What if my husband gets on the plane by himself, without me?
What if…
These scenarios were stealing my joy and the time that I could have spent in other ways. In the end, we got on board without an issue. We even got the emergency exit with more leg room and my husband and I sat together. Plus, our connection flight was delayed by almost an hour and a half, and we got there with 30 minutes to spare.
Everything worked out better than I imagined.
I am learning to be open and think positive about problems as well as the situations that I am facing and not relying on my feelings, like I have historically done. Feelings can change as well as my own “what if” scenarios since I only have my own limited experiences.
It is hard to step out in faith and try to be positive and open to different experiences. But, I am learning that when I don’t overthink it and just do it, it usually turns out better than I ever thought.
