A PCS Must Do: Stay Connected

We’re currently transitioning at my parents’ home in Kentucky between PCS moves from Michigan to South Carolina. All six of us (husband, four boys, and I) packed what we needed for a four-week stint between moves as we await our household goods delivery the first week of July.

We’ve been here almost three weeks and have the luxury of spending time with family and neighbors since the day we drove up the long gravel driveway.

This is the home I was raised in from an infant with my brother and sissy. The same country creek in the field behind the house that I played in as a little girl is now the most desired destination spot for my boys to visit. Our boys play hard every day within minutes of waking up, mainly outside with their cousins either shooting basketball or playing baseball in the merged yards between my brother’s and parents’ houses under my sister-in-law’s coaching. After supper and the sun goes down, we can count on the white tubs and showers needing a good cleaning out of light mud residue from their daily adventures on the farm.

As inconvenient as it is with our family of six (to include our belongings) crammed wall-to-wall into two back bedrooms, I wouldn’t change a single thing. Sure, we’re conditioned to our space, our way of living, our privacy and such, but this is what our hearts and souls need now—to be connected.

During our time in Kentucky, we celebrated our son Harrison’s 10th birthday with family. At his request, Mimi (my mama) cooked him a special birthday dinner of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, dinner rolls with butter and jelly, green beans, cantaloupe, watermelon, corn from the garden, and a birthday cake. All the cousins hovered around him at the end of the kitchen table as we sang “Happy Birthday” and presented the cake for his wish. The joy he received from being literally surrounded by love was priceless.

We attended Sunday service together at the church in which I grew up. I shared a hymnal and sang with my Daddy on Father’s Day. My sister and her family also attended, so when we easily took over an entire pew our collective presence moved my dad to tears as he shared how thankful he was for our family to be there with the entire church body at the end of service.

I won’t ever take this time together shared in the physical presence of my family for granted, for these moments are few and far between for most military families.

We were also able to attend a coveted traditional family event on my dad’s side of the family called “1st Sunday” after church, where at least 35 of us shared a Southern home-cooked potluck-style meal at my cousin’s home in town. This event reminded us that we’re loved, supported, and valued—despite the typical geographical dispersion for our own little military family. Family connects our hearts and souls. It never hurts to fellowship together over a beautiful meal!

As I type this, my dad and mama are preparing for another family reunion event hosted here at the house for my mama’s side of the family, the Hart side, which I estimate at least 40 will attend. Tomorrow evening, we’ll gather to be in one another’s company over an amazing BBQ picnic-style meal and end our evening with a kick-ball tournament which will most likely include at least one injury for those of us over 40 (Love you, Mitch).

Even through the magic of being constantly stimulated with family while staying at home, I still remain in sporadic contact with my friends and colleagues. However, a disadvantage to living in the country is that technological advances of reliable cell phone service and internet access are not a thing here in the foothills. This fact alone has proved to make me feel disconnected to my friends lately.

If I want to get in touch with someone, if I want to scroll Facebook or Instagram, if I need to check or reply to an email to stay connected to any of my circles or organizations, I have to begin with a 20-minute drive to town. Aggravating as that may seem, I have a hypothesis that most of my friends are currently smiling while light bulbs are going off in their heads as they read this, because this is probably some true psychology into why I rarely know or care where my phone is at any given moment.

Realizing that the physical and spiritual connections for my boys are a must during this transition period has allowed me to prioritize what our family needs as a collective whole. Figuring out how to balance these physical, emotional, and spiritual connection pieces has about zapped my energy, but I am 100% committed to doing so as there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

We can count on the unconditional love and support of our family and friends, now and always. This fact alone breaks down doubts, fears, uncertainties, insecurities, or any anxieties that overwhelm the unknown.

Just keep swimming, and do your best to stay connected during this time if you’re going through a transition period in your life.

Stay connected.