Expecting the Unexpected

For some time now, my family has been waiting to see where the military will take us next, and we prepare ourselves fo expecting the unexpected. As of October of last year, we’ve been at our current duty station for three years, and we swiftly expected there would be a phone call or email with more information about the next phase of military life once this threshold was met.

However, we reached the end of October without a peep.

And then we went through November and December, still without any word.

I wasn’t complaining, of course, because now that my son’s in preschool (and let me say, a pretty good preschool program), I was dreading the idea of moving or even staying behind while he finished the school year with my husband going to the next place. But then, in January, something unexpected happened.

I think when you’ve reached the point in the military that you’re enlisted “indefinitely” and “needs of the military” becomes the primary factor in your next steps, things start to become more unexpected. This can be an uneasy feeling, especially when, after so many years,  you’ve come to know what to expect.

My husband received an email stating he was under review for recruiting or drill sergeant selection. Being the spouse of someone who does mainly office work, this all sounds incredibly unappealing to me, not only as a spouse, but also as a parent with two kids under 4 at home. He just had a two-month school last summer, and both of these jobs require more schooling. Not only that, the actual work hours can be long in both cases.

I found myself hoping he’d be selected for recruiting over drill sergeant, but on the flip side, there’s the fear of the unknown with our family having several members with EFMP needs. From my understanding, the recruiting side doesn’t screen for EFMP needs, and it’s left to you to do your due diligence to ensure the location you might go to will have the services you require.

I have some concerns about being asked to live in a place that might not be safe.

I have concerns about having a good school for my son, who’s in a preschool to help him catch up before kindergarten. He’s doing so well at school, and he’s had such great progress that I worry it could be stunted or lost with a move. Both of my kids have spent all or the majority of their young lives where we are now, so I hope a change won’t affect them.

Ironically, my husband requested a year long stabilization last May so our son could go to school this year, and it was denied. We knew we’d be leaving, but it seems silly it was denied now since we’ll be here until May no matter what. Going into February, we’re still waiting to find out what the next step could be.

I have so many questions, and while I’m enjoying what could be left of the normal we spent establishing for the last three years, I wonder what the future will bring.

If he does become a recruiter, will we be okay?

Will we have a military community?

Will our kids be able to adjust?

I can only hope we find more answers soon, and that any path the military sends us on, whether that be one of these selections or something else, that we will revel in the resilience we have spent many years trying to build.

Wish us luck.

What is the most unexpected thing to happen during your service member’s career? What advice do you have for someone who might become part of a recruiting or drill sergeant community? Sound off in the comments below!