Lucky to be a Milspouse

This is us, Milpouse tribe! Forged by fire, friendship, and a wee bit of milspouse luck.

There is a lot of focus in our world on “hunting the goodsStuff” and  “finding our joy” (or if you find yourself in some of my worlds, ”embracing the suck”), and it leads me to the question that Clint Eastwood made famous…

Do you feel lucky . . . punk? 

Even if you don’t believe in luck or if you subscribe to the notion of creating your own luck (although, remember that Jack Dawson of tragic Titanic fame also believed in creating his own luck), you have to admit that sometimes it would be nice to scratch off the winning numbers, win the PTA raffle, sink that half court shot, or maybe even get the duty station of your dreams.

We often live this life under the assumption that we can’t control much and that is absolutely true. If it were not, we would all be stationed in Hawaii or Germany! 

Let’s take a moment and look at our lives through the green-hued lens of “shamrock optimism” and apply it to the life and luck of a military spouse!

1. If you’re Irish, it doesn’t matter where you go . . . you’ll find family. —Victoria Smurfit

All you need to do is substitute the word “Irish” for “military.” This is our mantra—hands down! Most of our military life, we rely on the family we made in months or minutes. It is perplexing to many not of our world. It is hard to explain, and we are lucky that we do not have to explain it . . . we just live it!

2. The best luck of all is the luck you make yourself. —Gen. Douglas MacArthur

Here comes the General, speaking truth! We are lucky we have to be creative in this life. Creative enough to take advantage of overseas postings and travel, travel, travel. Creative enough to be stationed somewhere remote as Fort Irwin or Guantanamo Bay and create lifelong friendships. Creative enough to start businesses with our skills and job opportunities with what is available. Creative enough to collaborate with neighbors as we create pantry PCS meals with green beans and cake mixes (thanks, Kelley B). We are the lucky ones who do not have time to wait; we must create!

3. You’ve got to think lucky. If you fall into a mud hole, check your back pocket . . . you might have caught a fish. —Darrell Royal

Coach has a point here! Sometimes we feel so unlucky to be stuck in a place that feels (and often looks) like a mud hole. But if you ask a few milspouses, those mud holes turned out to be the places or times they miss the most. Lots of fishing to be done in a mud hole. Don’t get stuck, try your luck!

4. A good friend is like a four-leaf clover, hard to find and lucky to have. —Irish proverb

This proverb is applicable to the milspouse world as well. I don’t know about you, but I feel our milspouse world is covered with four-leaf clovers. Not all of them grow as tall or are as visible as others, but they are there, waiting to be found. With a little luck, we may be able to find one at every station!

5. Thats what the holidays are for . . . For one person to tell the stories and another to dispute them. Isn’t that the Irish way?” —Lara Flynn Boyd

Or the Army way! And, boy, do we have some stories in the military. If you are lucky enough to have spent a “friendsgiving” or other holiday event with old military friends, you know the sheer joy in the telling and retelling of what really happened during training, deployments, and ordinary life together. Aren’t we lucky to share the journey with great storytellers?

6. You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from. —Cormack McCarthy 

We are often told as milspouses to never play the “who-has-it-worse” game, and that is good advice, but there are times when those tough moves and difficult situations actually could be saving you from something worse. It will take hindsight to see this, so if you are in a bad luck situation, hang tight!

7. I believe luck is preparation meeting opportunity. If you hadn’t been prepared when the opportunity came along, you wouldn’t have been lucky. —Oprah Winfrey

Our service members are examples of this one. They are always training to be prepared. Milspouses are also prepared. Nothing sets a milspouse into action faster than an RFO. Time to research and crowdsource until you are ready to move and jump into your new community. The preparation seems never ending, but how many times have you moved and everything just fell into place? The more prepared we are, the more opportunities we will find!

Thanks for taking the time to reflect on how lucky we are to be in this life together. I will leave you with my favorite Irish Blessing:

May the road rose to meet you.

May the wind be at your back.

May the sun shine softly on your face.

And may God hold you in the palm of his hand.