5 Essentials Attitudes for Moving Overseas
When moving overseas with the military, there are numerous resources dedicated to helping you with the nitty-gritty details: what to pack, what to leave behind in storage, your household goods weight allowance, information about moving with a pet, and even point-by-point details of how to prepare and ship your vehicle. Your overseas sponsor should help you with practical information about the area ahead of time and logistics as you arrive in country.
But what about the unknowns? What are the essentials for living overseas for several years? What attitudes are most important? And on the flip side, what should you leave behind? While my own family has learned a thing or two from four overseas assignments over my husband’s years of military service, I also polled some other long-time military families for their expert opinions. My hope is that our experiences will help you have your best overseas assignment.
Here are five essentials for an OCONUS move:
1. Bring your positive attitude; leave your preconceptions.
No, it won’t be exactly what you expected or what you’ve seen in movies. There’s simply no way to understand what living in another country is like until you get there. We moved to Germany in the dead of winter, and while I’d expected an instant “The hills are alive!” Sound of Music experience, what I remember the most about our first impression was the gray of the skies and my attempts at navigating our family’s minivan down the narrow village streets. Needless to say, I had to adjust my expectations to reality (though we did have a von Trapp family moment later in the spring!).
Expert milspouse tip: Learn the local language as soon as you can, at least basic greetings and courtesies. Christine says: “One of the biggest and most important things I learned in Germany was to always greet a German before any request, even before asking if they spoke English. People are much more responsive when you start off with a nicety!”
2. Bring your sense of adventure; leave your hermit-like tendencies.
When faced with something so foreign, your natural tendency may be to hole up inside your familiar home. Take the opportunity to visit, explore, and get out there! Find a travel buddy and start small. Venture out a few miles to see some sights, then a few more, and the next thing you know, you’ll be navigating trains and touring new places like a pro.
Expert milspouse tip: Jan advises, “Dive into the culture and enjoy it! Try different things, eat different foods, and embrace the culture. Buy a few good pieces of furniture, dishes, or something that you will cherish as a keepsake in the years to come.”
3. Bring your willingness to learn; leave your American way for thinking.
Whether it’s being scolded for unwittingly mowing your lawn during “quiet hours” in Europe or being teachable about a more laid-back lifestyle like the island locals in the Pacific, realize you can learn something from wherever you’re stationed. This is such an amazing time to experience other ways of life.
Expert milspouse tip: Katie mentions, “Things may take twice as long as they do in the U.S. I can only speak of living overseas with no military-type facilities. Most days I find myself in a ‘logic-free’ zone!”
4. Bring your appreciation; leave your complaints over annoyances.
Unfortunately, at every overseas location we’ve lived at, I’ve run across spouses who waste their entire tour complaining and infecting others with their negativity. While I don’t pretend there aren’t challenges (the time my children and I stayed a year overseas alone while my husband was deployed comes to mind), I remind myself of people who’d give anything to experience our travels and opportunities. A little bit of a reality check while viewing a medieval castle or driving only 30 minutes to visit another country is good for perspective!
Expert milspouse tip: Persephone says, “I had friends who really had a hard time with the separation from family and friends stateside. They were not able to be happy. My thought was, ‘Where my husband is, is where my family is.’ This made me able to conform to all the changes. I wanted to be with my husband more than anywhere else.”
5. Bring the knowledge that the experience is worth it; leave the countdown behind.
While it isn’t always easy to be in the moment, I’d encourage you to do just that. Treasure your time overseas and realize that once it’s over, you too will look back and fondly remember the good parts. And, just a bit like labor, the challenging times will fade from your memory, and you might even find yourself asking, “Can we get another overseas assignment?”
By Jen McDonald, MilitaryByOwner Advertising Content Editor
