perspective

Mistresses of the Military

February 22, 2022February 22, 2022 LaVaughn Ricci 4 Comments Military Life, military spouse, perspective

It began during our first year of marriage, these mistresses. He brought the first one home one night. When I questioned my husband, his reasoning made sense to me, so I said no more.

But she persisted, and soon he was spending more and more time with this “mistress.” I would hear the conversations, and I became increasingly annoyed, and then even angry.

He said it was ending. We had orders to PCS. I remained patient and tried again with him at the following assignment.

But it got worse.

Experience Military Life Relationships

Managing Expectations

February 9, 2022February 12, 2022 Annie Pearce 2 Comments advice, mental health, military marriage, perspective

Have you ever asked your significant other for help? Did it help? Or did you both just end up frustrated? You have to think about managing expectations even when asking for help.

For most people in that situation, you both end up frustrated because your significant other thinks, “well, I helped” and you think “you didn’t do enough”. If by chance you are most people, then the issue may have been communication. One person’s definition of help is not the same as someone else’s definition. The solution is to explain it…

Deployment Military Life

The Truth About Rapid Deployment

February 8, 2022February 8, 2022 Sarah Peachey 2 Comments deployment, military family, Military Life, perspective

Some people say, “live each day as if he deploys tomorrow.” In a way, it sounds great, but then life happens when deployment isn’t on the brain. Your kids need help when they get home from school. Your baby or toddler requires your attention more often than not. You might have a job that exhausts your brain and tires your body. You might have volunteer positions or children’s activities in the evenings. Before you know it, there’s no time left to live like he deploys tomorrow. There’s barely enough time to wash your hair or find a moment of peace.

Experience

The Power of Listening

January 6, 2022January 4, 2022 Sara Jane Arnett 2 Comments community, friendship, perspective

I recently discovered a small store in our hometown that specializes in customized gifts and keepsakes. I placed an order for a friend’s Christmas gift, and began communication with the owner, Christina.

Experience Household 6

The Extra Christmas Stocking

December 4, 2021December 2, 2021 Sara Jane Arnett 2 Comments encouragement, holidays, perspective

Something told me to buy that extra Christmas stocking. I’m so glad I did.

It was a couple of days after Christmas, and I had some gift certificates burning a hole in my pocket. My boys were little (4, 6, and 8), and we desperately needed to up our Holiday decorating with matching Christmas stockings, so this was top priority on my shopping list. I walked into Kohl’s (with that glorious Kohl’s cash in my wallet nearing expiration) and headed straight back to the holiday clearance section.

Deployment Experience Military Life

Celebrating Holidays: Military Style

November 12, 2021November 12, 2021 Sara Jane Arnett 1 Comment holidays, military family, Military Life, perspective

This year will be the 16th Thanksgiving my husband and I have been married and the eighth one we’ve had to celebrate separately because of geographic separation. While our sons and I look forward to spending Thanksgiving in Dallas with dear friends while my husband is deployed, it reminds me of how our military lifestyle has shaped and molded us into what spending the holidays together looks like for military families. You make the most of whatever situation you’re in at the moment!

Expert Household 6

6 Things You Won’t Regret Saying During Thanksgiving

November 7, 2021November 4, 2021 Just Moved Ministry 1 Comment gratitude, holidays, military family, perspective

Simply put, Thanksgiving is all about being thankful and having a grateful heart, but I’m getting a little bit crazy with the holidays coming.

I’m filling the calendar, scheduling time with friends, thinking about turkeys—the ones on sale? stuffed or unstuffed this year?—remembering to find recipes, making lists of ingredients, and pulling down fall decoration boxes from the garage, only to take a deep breath when I see the Christmas boxes next to them.

It’s obvious my mind is like a merry-go-round, whirling with things to do.

Experience Health & Fitness Household 6 Military Life

Emotional Labor of Being a Military Spouse

October 17, 2021October 14, 2021 Anna Larson 4 Comments mental health, Military Life, military spouse, perspective

A few years ago, I read an article about emotional labor. The author described her experience of asking for one simple gift for Mother’s Day. She wanted someone to deep clean her home. Her husband waited until the last minute, then decided it was too expensive. In addition, he couldn’t find a cleaning service for the day he wanted, so instead, he “cleaned” the bathrooms leaving her to watch their children destroy the rest of the house.

He thought he gave her the gift she wanted.

Experience Military Life

I Wish, I Wonder, I Hurt

September 23, 2021September 22, 2021 LaVaughn Ricci 2 Comments military family, Military Life, perspective

I wish there was more I could do right now. My husband wishes he could have done more in the past. I wonder if we could have made a bigger difference. I hurt because we’re stuck and feeling helpless.

Afghanistan. We wish, wonder, and hurt for Afghanistan.

My husband willingly answered the call and completed two, 12-month tours in the Middle East many years ago. We were still only dating and had no children. My soldier’s sacrifice was great, and as with every tour overseas, he had its burdens to carry. However, it didn’t anguish our family in the way it has for many others, because my husband didn’t have all of us quite yet.