The Year It All Came Together

Well, most of it, that is.

It seems that no matter who your ears tune into these days, someone somewhere is sharing their story of sorrow and distress. This year has really done a number on a number of us.

My bishop, for example, was put on life support, my beautiful baby girl had to be tested for COVID-19, and close friends of mine lost loved ones. The stories go on and on. But even amidst all of this chaos there is hope, good news, and, yes, even blessings.

Mr. Rogers’ mother would tell him to “look for the helpers” whenever tragedy occurred. Hard times such as these have a way of showing us just who those wonderful human beings are. Helpers come from every walk of life, every race, tongue, and even age. I have enjoyed learning about some them and watching their stories. In this way, social media has been a blessing. And as you know, that’s saying a lot.

I suppose I could say that my year has been one of woe as well. I would have graduated this semester, but Corona changed that. My eldest daughter moved out, and I didn’t get to spend her birthday with her. I missed my annual holiday meal with my parents, and that was very difficult but not nearly as difficult as the loss my family has experienced.

But I would be remiss if I did not share with you the life changing happenings that have occurred within me even in the midst of this pandemic.

It took a global crisis for me to finally bunker down and begin to build my foundation.

It was February 2020, and I was neck deep in baseball sign-ups, dance rehearsals, and martial arts lessons for my kids. Snippets of free time were few and far between, dollars flew out of bank accounts before I had a chance to count them, and we were living paycheck-to-paycheck.

Every weekday, it was the same.

An early alarm would wake me, and the rat race would begin. My kids were so hurried I barely had time to breathe their lovely faces in each crazy morning. The days are so different now.

Now, they wake up whenever their bodies decide it’s time, and they pretty much rule their time until an hour before school. I have no objections to this. By the time 9 a.m. rolls around, I’ve already gotten ready for the day, done my workout routine, and showered and am far more prepared mentally for them. Homeschooling is an everchanging and evolving adventure, but I’m patient with myself, extremely resourceful, and incredibly determined to make this work.



I always wanted to homeschool, ever since my now 22 year old was a baby, but I never took the plunge. Funny how unprecedented time made such a wonderful thing possible for us.

Then, there’s my schooling. Yes, I had to ease up by 75% on my own academics so that I could be there for theirs, but I haven’t quit. My path will take three times as long, but that’s okay. What matters most anymore is balance, not timelines. I can’t stress enough what a blessing this edit in my thinking has made.

As far as finances are concerned, the closing of businesses means the money that would normally go out, doesn’t. It stays right there, waiting for something to do. And with everyone buying all of the toilet paper (I still don’t get that), it only made sense for me to finally create that food storage closet that I had long talked about, and stock it, too.

And I didn’t stop there.

I am proud to say that a deep freezer and larger refrigerator were soon added to the collection. I realize that for some it may not seem like much, but to me… this was monumental. I grew up having just enough, but now we have enough for another shut down, hurricane, or who knows what. The funds that normally would have gone to overpriced dance lessons were now funneled to security and emergency preparedness. That peace of mind is invaluable any day, but especially so during times such as these.

But that’s not all. Being alone with your thoughts teaches you quite a bit about yourself. When the distractions are pulled aside, you have an opportunity to see who it is you really are. And what I saw was a woman desperately in need of a makeover. Not one involving hair, wardrobe, and handbags, but real self evaluation.

What did I want? What kind of woman do I want to be? How did I want people to experience my energy?



In order to become a better version of myself, I dove into the world of books, exercise, better sleep, and eating right. I began seeing a therapist weekly, purging my home, selling things that no longer “brought me joy,” and made my home feel homier. I led a more disciplined lifestyle that, ironically enough, was a more freeing way to live.

In a way, it’s similar to the freedom that traffic lights give us to move about safely to our destinations.

I am grateful for the choices that I have made during these crazy times. The person I was at the beginning of year is not the same one ending the year—thank goodness! And whatever is to come, I’m ready.



As Willie Sutton said, “Do not serve time, let time serve you.”