A New Normal

If you had asked me at the beginning of the year if I thought this is how 2020 would go, I would probably have thought you were crazy. Near the end of December, I heard about the alarm being sounded by the Chinese doctor in Wuhan who eventually died from COVID-19, but I didn’t understand then what he was trying to warn the rest of the world about. Now that it has migrated to America, it’s quite sad that we weren’t able to understand the full extent of what China was experiencing at the end of 2019.

In Illinois, we have been asked to shelter in place since the middle of March. My son was already home from school that week before the shelter-in-place order went into effect. The weekend before, we didn’t do much. We stopped at Home Depot for our usual kids’ workshop, but it had been canceled. The employee told us that Home Depot had canceled them nationwide to avoid large gatherings of kids, especially in bigger cities. We got our workshop kit and left.

I didn’t think it was that big of a deal, honestly. I thought maybe they were overblowing it. The next day we went to the Saint Louis Zoo. It was a really nice day, and there were actually a lot of people there. After all, this was near the middle of March, and warm days are not a frequent occurrence during this time of year.

Monday, my son comes home with the start of what I believe is the stomach flu. He’d had it several times this school year, and I kept him home.

But, I had a lightbulb moment that day.

What could he have touched at the zoo, or maybe elsewhere, to have gotten this so easily? I kept him home since he was ill, and the next week, school was officially closed and e-learning was put into place.

Sheltering in place has come with a lot of unknowns and challenges. The biggest challenge is helping my toddlers understand why we are at home. Why can’t we go to the zoo? Why can’t we go to school and see our friends? Why can’t we go to the playground behind our house? Why can’t we go to the play place where we get lunch sometimes, or get out of the car and go inside to eat? Why can’t we go to the commissary? Why aren’t we able to see the Easter bunny this year?

It’s hard to get small children to understand the gravity of something that so many adults have a hard time grasping. What if they got sick? What if my husband or I got sick? The outcome could be grave, and certainly change the entire course of our lives. Even those without preexisting health issues are suffering greatly. Am I washing my hands enough? Did I touch something I shouldn’t have? Am I cleaning everything I need to be? Am I keeping my family safe?

The military stop-movement order has also derailed many plans. In my last blog, Expecting the Unexpected, I talked about the news we’d received in January. My husband had learned he was being considered for either recruiting or drill sergeant selection. Shortly after this blog, we found out he’d been given a school date for recruiting.

I spent most of my energy focusing on the fact that we would be moving right after school was over in May, without a lot of time between recruiting school ending and a report date. (It’s a 45 day turnaround from recruiting graduation to report date in case you’re wondering.)

The thing about recruiting that is different than a regular PCS, is you aren’t given your location assignment until you’re at school. If you’re enrolled in EFMP, it takes even longer to find out your location assignment. You might know where you are moving four to six weeks before you’re leaving, so you have the time to find housing and leave your previous duty station. It’s a really fast PCS, and we all know moving is already stressful.

My husband had a school date at the very end of March. He would finish mid-May, our son would finish school near the end of May, and we would move the following week before his report date at the end of June. The stop-movement swiftly put an end to that.

When I saw that it was set to last until the end of May, I thought it was a very long time. Perhaps an overreaction. But now that May is here, I’m not so sure. The numbers aren’t slowing down in most places. His school date was rescheduled for late summer. I am left to wonder if he will actually go then, or if it will be rescheduled again, and will schools open in the fall?

It’s scary living with the unknown. I hope for the best, and do my best to control what I can. My kids are definitely struggling, and I think we all are to some extent. I feel thankful that the military has job security, and we aren’t struggling to pay the bills.

But, I am certainly struggling with maintaining normalcy, because life is anything but normal right now. This year has certainly not gone like I thought, but I have hope that science will help us all find some semblance of normal someday soon, and that we can go back to living our lives closer to pre-pandemic times. It will take time, but it’s something I look forward to.

Has coronavirus affected your PCS? How are you helping your family find a new normal? Sound off in the comments below!