Finding Purpose in the Pause
A couple of years ago, I took a trip home to Virginia to spend some time with my parents. We were stationed at Fort Bragg in North Carolina at the time, so the short four-hour drive to extended family was a welcomed retreat.
While I was visiting, they took me to one of the Civil War battlefields to walk along the paved paths and soak in some beauty and fresh air. On this scenic route, I was accompanied by my furry walking partner, Bailey. Now, Bailey is a sweet, black Labrador Retriever, but she has awful leash manners. She will pull and tug the first 15 minutes of any walk—guaranteed. She is on a mission to find things to sniff and locate other dogs. As she nearly pulled my shoulder out of socket during this particular stroll, I started to get increasingly frustrated with her lack of chill. Didn’t she realize there was no hurry? There was so much to see and look at and soak in right where we were. Why was she in such a rush? Her hurry was making me miss some really beautiful things. 
In that moment, I realized that I can often be the same way—always looking ahead to the next thing, running on the hamster wheel of life, missing what’s right in front of me.
I realized in that moment that there was a life lesson to be learned: There are treasures of opportunities, beauty, and special moments that cannot be grasped if I don’t pause and make space to encounter them.
As military spouses we have our fair share of pauses: delayed orders, family life on pause while a spouse is deployed, and of course the infamous “hurry up and wait” that we’ve all experienced in various ways within this wild ride of army life. And currently, many of us are experiencing possibly one of the biggest pauses in our life as our nation navigates COVID-19.
How do you react to the pauses of life? They can be annoying, inconvenient, and frustrating. But what if the pause makes space for some really great things?
More walks with the family.
Truly listening—with your eyes and ears.
Baking something new with your child.
Finally learning how to play that video game with your teenage son.
More family game nights.
Trying watercolor for the first time.
Finally finishing that book.
Sitting on the back deck on a sunny day without your phone, soaking in the beauty.
Calling that family member who you haven’t spoken to in forever.
Organizing, cleaning, and de-cluttering your home.
Then there are the detours that precede the pause: a last minute change in duty station assignment, an unexpected deployment, a PCS a year too soon, not getting the job you applied for, an unexpected illness. Anger, frustration, and questions of why fill your mind. And often times, we won’t know “why” until further in the future when we can look back and see the purpose in it all.
As you are navigating whatever life-pause you are in, I encourage you to search for the beauty and purpose in your season. It’s easy to hurry along to the next thing, but this pause won’t last forever, and just maybe there’s something special in it that you won’t want to miss.
